Celebration

A young man stumbles into a pub and tells the barman to line up seven shots of Jack Daniels.
He downs them all one after the other.
"Wow!" exclaims the barman, "What was that for?"
"I had my first blow-job" the young man replies.
"Well, in that case a bottle of champagne is on the house" the barman offers.
"That's Ok" says the customer, "If seven Jack Daniels doesn't get rid of the taste then nothing will."

Geek Sex

Scientists, no doubt who are single, have calculated a formula for your optimum sexual performance time.

AL / T + 10 x AG / SF x G = ST

AL = alchohol units per week
AG = Age
SF = Sexual frequency per week
G = Gender 1.5 female, 2.0 male
T = Sex time preference 1.5 morning, 2.0 evening

add or subtract ST to 6am for your horniest time.

It's 10.40am ..... how about it?

Better late than never

It sounds like somebody has got their fingers burnt.

President George W Bush has warned the US must break its "addiction" to oil, in his State of the Union address.
He said the US was too reliant on oil, often from "unstable" countries, and had to find alternatives.

It would also be better for this planets climate if you researched something alternative, George, not just because you realised you can't fight the 'unstable' world when things arent going your way.